MILF&Cookies

Andie // On My Honor // pop punk and sexual undertones // aggressively unfancy // in search of sleep, sanity, and The Shire // superb at parallel parking // I might not go down in history, but I'll go down on you // recommended by 4 out of 5 // I'm out of clever ways to impress you.
My Face and Other Things

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ayeeee hit me up with the dirty asks

wifipasswords:

Let’s play a fun game called “we’re just friends but I’d fuck you if you asked”

(via homeforfall)

alantyson:

Actually really good career advice from a laughing homicidal madman.

(Source: heathledgers, via n0-transitory)

esm398:

jakebumlick:

pika-brew:

pika-brew:

My roommate and I are really sick and we look like shit, but we were hungry so we ordered pizza.
But we didn’t want anyone to see us, so we asked them over the phone if we can leave the money on the door and they can just drop off the pizza.

The guy said sure.

So we decided to leave a nice little note
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and we hung it above the door bell. I hope they like it!

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oMGGGG

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pizza cares

Pizza understands

(via dannyfand0m)

legains:

If you had sex today I hate you.

(via n0-transitory)

petite-madame:

Jared Padalecki as The Winter Soldier and Jensen Ackles as Captain America. My contribution to this month’s Spn art challenge and the theme “Poster Movie Crossover”.

(via black-magdalena)

Harry Potter + the shirt

(via jontpirtle)

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